- Paula
HAIR TODAY, STILL HAIR TOMORROW
Remember that great, great aunt you had as a kid? I remember mine. She was little with snowy white hair, softly spoken, slightly rounded shoulders and had a huge tache.
Since hitting my 40‘s, the occasional rogue hair that used to appear on my chin in my 30’s, has a pal or three. Scrap that. It’s now a frickin colony and these tricky little b*stardos settle in quicker than squatter in Brighton!
My morning makeup routine in my 30’s used to be as follows;
cleanse, tone, moisturise
foundation and blush or bronzer
neutral eye shadow, flick of eye liner
do hair before curling eye lashes and adding mascara
finish slurp of coffee before adding lip gloss
Five to ten minutes tops.

Picture used with kind permission of the rather lovely and talented Jane Cunningham - aka the infamous @britbeautyblog - giving herself a Sunday night tweeze... Photo by @labelsforlunch... check them both out!
And now?
cleanse, acid tone, serum, eye cream, moisturiser - consider adding spot gel on something suspiciously red - squeeze blackhead that has arrived overnight
ponder adding sun cream for three minutes before deciding not to
stand in best light possible with magnifying mirror and stare/squint at chin, upper lip and brows for 5 minutes to survey damage and new growth
push chin upwards whilst using self taught Braille skills to feel for anything spikey - find 3 new sprouts and tug to remove with tweezers, feeling accomplished
foundation and bronzer and blush and cheek hi lighter strobe - more is more
neutral eye shadow
take magnifying mirror in to bathroom as it has bigger window and stand on the toilet so as to get nearer the light source
check tache area in case anything has grown since adding foundation
change tweezers for sharper pair
decide bathroom ceiling needs painting - get phone and send self reminder
flick of eye liner
examine flick of eye liner in magnifying mirror and realise how shit it is and start again whilst contemplating permanent make up tattoo
do hair
change parting four times as magnifying mirror says roots need doing and white pubes are now sprouting in my fringe
find powder root colour dust and add with gusto
curl eye lashes with industrial strength curler and debate setting with hair spray
find phone again and send reminder to self to book eye lash lift (curling my lashes is like lifting a garage door!)
Add water proof, bomb proof, run proof, sweat proof mascara
make another coffee
drink coffee whilst rechecking chin and find a white hair I hadn’t seen that wouldn’t go amiss on Gandalf
add lip gloss
And I wonder why I’m shattered? Are you a plucker, a waxer or a bleacher?
